I don’t know why seeing a picture of you still hurts so much sometimes. 

Sometimes I just have one of those days. I can’t predict it, and I can’t do anything to change it. It hits me like a bag of bricks, I feel weighted down, and I all I want to do is take some pills and sleep. I feel like I can’t deal with what the day has to bring. After starting that pill, I don’t have those days as often, but they still come upon me without warning once in a while. I haven’t had a bad one in a while, but after everything that’s been going on with my dad I know I can’t keep going without one for long. I try to distract myself with other things than to just sit and think. Because it’s thinking that often triggers those days. I hope to god that I will be able to just numbly make my way through this situation and whatever bullshit will surely surround it.